It's Metafilter's 20th anniversary! To celebrate, scan some cats or help fund Mefi! When does sex stop being painful and start being possible? If not, how long was it before it did? I'm asking this question so I can put my own and my girlfriend's experience into some context.
My year-old girlfriend was a virgin when we met and as yet we cannot enjoy sex through penetration — as intercourse is incredibly painful for her. I have three piercings through the head of my penis — a Prince Albert, Apadrayvia and Ampallang. Although I do remove these during intercourse, they are painful to replace afterwards. She says that her pain is lessening, but she is still physically reduced to tears during sex. I have noticed that this is stopping her from initiating anything sexual. She has no problem with arousal to orgasm but full penetrative sex is incredibly painful.
What gives? The medical term for painful sex is dyspareunia and, unfortunately, it has many possible causes. Lang says.
The following situations and conditions can contribute to or cause pain during intercourse or other forms of penetration. The first few times you have intercourse or experience vaginal penetration, you may feel a small to moderate amount of pain at the entrance to the vagina. There can be some bleeding or no bleeding at all—both are normal. The reasons for the pain are not always clear, but it is typically temporary. An unstretched hymen vaginal corona has typically been blamed for this pain at first penetration, but new understandings of the hymen suggest otherwise.